Everything, Everything was Disappointing, Disappointing

Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon

★ — 25%

Everything, Everything was my first contemporary. And it promised so much.

But I don’t even know what happened.

The first half was cute and light and adorable and then the second half turned it on its head. Basically it hopped on a train and shot off at 8596 mph and left me in the dust wondering where in the world my feelings were. But I’m glad I missed the train because it ended up heading in a horrible direction.

I won’t recommend it to anyone and I won’t read it again. I wasted my time the first time. Continue reading “Everything, Everything was Disappointing, Disappointing”

Heartless Really Was Heartless…To Every Reader Ever

Heartless by Marissa Meyer

★★★★ — 90%

What even did Marissa Meyer do to me this time???

I want to reread Heartless, but I also know better than that. Villain origin stories are sad enough already…I don’t need to read one twice knowing FULL WELL what cruelty is coming my way. ASDFJKLASJK HELP ME.


synopsis

Catherine may be one of the most desired girls in Wonderland and a favorite of the unmarried King, but her interests lie elsewhere. A talented baker, she wants to open a shop and create delectable pastries. But for her mother, such a goal is unthinkable for a woman who could be a queen.

At a royal ball where Cath is expected to receive the King’s marriage proposal, she meets handsome and mysterious Jest. For the first time, she feels the pull of true attraction. At the risk of offending the King and infuriating her parents, she and Jest enter into a secret courtship.

Cath is determined to choose her own destiny. But in a land thriving with magic, madness, and monsters, fate has other plans.


my thoughts

“Fascinating, isn’t it, how often heroic and foolish turn out to be one and the same.”

Heartless was nonsense and magic. It was delightful and strange. It was agony and tears and pain and happy squishiness AND YES, SO MUCH MADNESS. It felt like Wonderland and I need moaaar. (Ignore the fact that I have no credibility whatsoever because I haven’t even read Through the Looking Glass or Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland to really know. HA, LIFE. I also probably missed about 9659.3 references, but everything’s fine EVERYTHING’S FINE !!! I forget to read a classic and all it does and haunt me and bite me like a bad dog.)

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Heartless hit the spot between four and five stars. It was visceral and affected me the way only five star books can do. (CRYING. MOANING. OUT LOUD.) But it was also disappointingly slow, and the shallow part of me that is really 98% of me cares a lot about that. I am that kind of reader. Yes.

The world of Heartless definitely keyed into my love of the story and felt like how Caraval’s world was supposed to feel. It was playful and whimsical, but still sophisticated and serious. I savored every moment I spent there and I really want to complain about something but I CAN’T. (Also, there were no hatbox-shaped, candy-colored shops that made me want to smash vases, so that’s a plus !!!)

Probably the only thing better than Meyer’s world-building was her ability to write male characters, which makes everyone happy until it makes everyone cry. Jest and Hatta were fully realized characters with authentic personalities, flaws, sorrows, and mystery. They didn’t feel like caricatures when they could’ve so easily been made into them. Personally, I thought Hatta’s arc was stunning, but I always feel that way about the characters who walk the line between hero and villain. (Kaz Brekker, I’m looking at you. But I’m always looking at you, aren’t I?? #creep) That didn’t minimize the excellence of Jest’s arc or role, though. He was the main male protagonist, after all, and he was written splendidly. ABSOLUTELY. SPLENDIDLY. I need to see a therapist now, though.

The writing of the female characters, unfortunately, fell flat. Catherine’s characterization was nothing like the characterization of Cinder, Scarlet, Cress, or even Winter. Her development was put on hold until a climatic event suddenly pushed into a very sudden, striking change that was a little too sudden and striking to be believable. It was necessary, though, to turn her into the character she was supposed to be eventually (she is the Queen of Hearts, after all), but it could have happened slower, smoother, and more naturally. Oh, and I also almost hated her. So yes.

The only other aspect of the book that was disappointing was the plot. Which is kind of a big disappointment when I think about it because PLOTS! Plots are very necessary. For three hundred pages, the biggest conflict was whether Catherine would accept the King’s proposal or not and I was not the happiest camper. But sure enough, something plot-like did show up about halfway into the book, and even though some of the plot points didn’t make logical sense, the last hundred pages sped things up, which made me very forgiving. :)))) (See? I smile too. I’m nice. :))) As things began to connect, I thoroughly enjoying seeing the threads come together to introduce the Wonderland we all know.

Other things:

  • The writing felt pretentious at first, which was weird for a Marissa Meyer book, but once I got used to it and realized it fit the story, I was a-ok.
  • The romance was bad.
  • I wasn’t a fan.
  • But still, JEST
  • The ending was mean
  • REALLY MEAN.

All in all, Heartless was delightful + painful + adorable + I LOVED IT. I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend it or my favorite brand of tissues.


dirty talk

language

D–ning is used once.

violence

Some mild, wonderlandish violence.  Characters fight the Jabberwock (!!) and some characters get hurt in the process.  One man is murdered.

sensuality

Characters flirt and kiss.

substances

Characters drink wine on occasion.

Caraval by Stephanie Garber – Review

Caraval by Stephanie Garber: 3/5 Stars

Oh dear. Was this a joke? A mean joke played by dear old 2017? Yes. Yes, I dare say it was.

The covers are beautiful. If only there was more to them.

I don’t know what’s worse: that I actually finished Caraval or that it’s a series.

Let’s get into it.


Caraval by Stephanie Garber: 2/5 Stars

★ ★ ★

Young Adult / Genre: Fantasy, Romance / Content: 16+ / Recommended

Scarlett Dragna has never left the tiny island where she and her sister, Tella, live with their powerful, and cruel, father. Now Scarlett’s father has arranged a marriage for her, and Scarlett thinks her dreams of seeing Caraval—the faraway, once-a-year performance where the audience participates in the show—are over.

But this year, Scarlett’s long-dreamt-of invitation finally arrives. With the help of a mysterious sailor, Tella whisks Scarlett away to the show. Only, as soon as they arrive, Tella is kidnapped by Caraval’s mastermind organizer, Legend. It turns out that this season’s Caraval revolves around Tella, and whoever finds her first is the winner.

Continue reading “Caraval by Stephanie Garber – Review”

The Night Circus Just Ruined Any Chance I Ever Had of Enjoying Another Circus Book

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

★★★★ — 90%

Because nothing can ever live up to this, THAT’S WHY. I did probably the absolute worst thing I could ever do besides smash an antique vase (or stab someone HI the butler did it, I’m innocent) and decided to read Caraval right after I finished The Night Circus. #REGRET. It’s cruel on Caraval and it’s cruel on me.

Continue reading “The Night Circus Just Ruined Any Chance I Ever Had of Enjoying Another Circus Book”

Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo – Review

Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo: 5/5 Stars

So if y’all don’t know, I’m pretty obsessed with Leigh Bardugo, but I had never stepped foot in her Grisha Trilogy until now. I honestly thought that after Six of Crows nothing could compare (and let’s be honest, nothing will) and I had seen so many negative reviews about it on Goodreads that it kind of…slipped by me.

Until now.

Obviously.

And it was pretty amazing.

(Obviously.)


Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo: 5/5 Stars

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Young Adult / Genre: FantasyAction/Adventure / Content: 16+ / Recommended

Surrounded by enemies, the once-great nation of Ravka has been torn in two by the Shadow Fold, a swath of near impenetrable darkness. . . Now its fate may rest on the shoulders of one lonely refugee.

Alina Starkov has never been good at anything. But when her regiment is attacked on the Fold and her best friend is brutally injured, Alina reveals a dormant power that saves his life—a power that could be the key to setting her war-ravaged country free. Wrenched from everything she knows, Alina is whisked away to the royal court to be trained as a member of the Grisha, the magical elite led by the mysterious Darkling.

Yet nothing in this lavish world is what it seems. With darkness looming and an entire kingdom depending on her untamed power, Alina will have to confront the secrets of the Grisha . . . and the secrets of her heart.

Continue reading “Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo – Review”